I Really Said This

This morning I can't believe I used the line, "but my daughter is a lawyer" when someone got a little too "I am feeling sorry for you because your son is in an adult day program. I am very lucky that Eric is in an adult day program. There is a nationwide shortage of adult day program slots across the country.  I am very lucky that my local JCC cared enough about our family to create an adult day care program that Eric can go to and hang out with his friends.

Now I want everyone to know that I Love my children equally and am very blessed to have both of them in my life. They have each taken me down a different path in life. They have both taught me about life in their own way. I am very grateful that they let me come along for the ride.

It has not always been an easy path. I feel that at times I was not the best at my job of mom. I might not have given it my all to both Teri and Eric all the time. We manage to muddle through it somehow. We are a close tight family so I know that I did somethings right.

So I would like to say, Thank You to Teri and Eric for giving me a chance to be your mom. I would also like to say Thank You, to John for joining me in this adventure.

It Fell

Last night as I was putting a hat on the pile of hats and scarfs it fell over. Luckily for me it leaned against the wall. So how many hats, scarfs and cowls did it take to tip over? Here are the numbers: 29 hats, 4 scarfs and 1 cowl.

I will let you know how many rows are going to added for the 1 million row challenge on Raverly when I count them up.

Parenting

Parenting and in particular the parenting of special needs children and adults is the parent's job. In speaking to more than a number of parents on the subject more often then not I hear them complain about the lack of long term commitment from teachers, medical professionals and aides. This just rubs me the wrong way. Don't get me wrong sometimes there are just so many new people in Eric's life that I think my job should be called Training Specialist and not Mom.

I think that it is fantastic that ordinary people take time out of their lives to learn about and help our children. We have a lot of aides who need the volunteer credit, even if it is a paying job with a non-profit to get into medical or nursing school. I really love these people, they learn quickly are usually great at the task at hand and then move on when it is time for medical school. If we get these people from a year or 2, I am extremely happy. The things that they learn while caring for Eric can then be transferred to other families and enhance their carers. But they are not his parents and are not meant to be in his life forever.

Then there are the heroic Special Needs Teachers that not only have to learn a whole lot of things about their students medical and emotional needs even before the education process can even start. Also, every year there seems to be more paperwork required for each student, think of the 504 Plans, Individual Education Plans, paperwork to prove that grant money is being spent within the terms of the grant. Accident reports if a child stumbles and the corrective action that will be taken in the future so the child learning to walk will not stumble again. Did I mention parents with unrealistic goals for their children. From the start of teaching special education to leaving the field average is 10 years. No they will not be there forever. Neither will the teachers of your healthy children.

As for the wonderful people who staff our Adult Day Care Programs, please be very nice to these people. The pay is lower than I would like to see it. The hours are long. Our young adults are sometimes very difficult to work with. If you have a chance schedule a day to shadow your adult child and see how the staff works with them. I am always very happy to see these caring people go back to school to further their carers wherever it takes them. They are not meant to be in our adult children's lives forever.

Ending on a note that no one wants to think about is what happens if you as the parent gets hurt or you can't do your job as a parent? Do you have a backup plan in place? Does your support coordinator have this in writing. If you have guardianship for your adult child, the courts must approve the plan. Talk to your lawyer about this. Your relatives might not be up to the task. Planning is a must.

Just remember that nothing is forever.

Tilting

The pile of hats and scarfs is now 2 feet tall and starting to tilt. It's almost time to tag and bag them.

More Changes

More deep cleaning in the garage and Teri's old room. More of my the past left the house too. The bicycle that I bought when I was 13 made its way to Goodwill today along with a few other things. All my fiber is off the floor in Teri's old room. I am closer to getting a workbench into the room. The garage looks a whole lot better.

I have also moved some summer shirts that were too small last summer into my daily shirt rotation. My diet is simple, elimated all artificial sweeteners and high fructose corn syrup. My excersice plan is just as simple. I do more cleaning house,including deep cleaning and more walking. Just keep moving. This works for me,but please check with your personal physician before starting any diet or excersice routine.

Little Things

Today was a day of getting a lot of small things done. Days like this are necessary for the overall project, but are not as satisfying as getting lots accomplished. I think slower days are sometimes good for my body too.

3+3

Three boxes plus a pair of roller skates left for Goodwill today. Thee bags of recycling let the house too. Eric and I spent most of the day recouping from yesterday.

I have also come to the conclusion that engineers and artists look at mass in different ways. This is especially true when it come to de-cluttering and reorganization of the household.