Today was not a fabulous day. It took me all day to run and empty the dishwasher. It it got done. I got up early despite a bad night. I got to Trader Joe’s early, all I can say it is winter in Tucson. I was not in the store 5 minutes when some older lady started walking off with my cart. She apologized and said she could not tell the carts apart. Then kept on apologizing. Then there an older gentleman who got stuck in the frozen food aisle, he just stood there. Ten minutes later when I realized that I had forgotten something and went back, he was still in the same spot.
I really wish people would pay more attention to the older people in their lives. Ask me how I know how hard it is to be the sandwich generation. Despite having 2 kids at home. Volunteering at their schools. Doing community service projects. Carving out time for me. I still found time to make sure my father in law got to all his appointments. Made sure he had all his shopping done. Took him out to lunch and family time. I also helped take care of an uncle too. Took him out to lunch. Checked in on him. Did errands for him.
There comes a time when you have to step up and become the adult. There comes a time when you have to say no, you can’t go south for the winter. Where you have to reverse roles. It is not fare to put someone with mild dementia in a situation where they are all alone and confused. They probably should not be driving either. The accident rate goes up in the winter in Tucson. When our snowbirds get confused they drive in the bicycle lanes which is dangerous for everyone. They ignore traffic signs and lights, that might be a visual or cognitive problem. They confuse the break and accelerator pedals. They will drive 20mph in the fast lane in a 45mph zone. They will drive here even when they lost their drivers license back home because we are the Wild West. It is a state law that you have a valid license to drive here.
Please be kind to the elders in your lives. They have great stories to tell. If after everything I have said you still want to send your elders to Tucson, please take advantage of the many care companies and adult living homes.
Thank you.
