Cleaning Out The Cobwebs

 Today I decided to clean out one of Eric’s boxes. I kept the yearbooks and the pictures.  Threw out the yearly journals.  Also a lot of awards for the best smile and friend.  Birth certificates for his stuffed friends. I did some crying too.  In the end I expected to reuse the box for yarn, but that did not happen.  There were several big cracks on the bottom of the box.  The net result was that I reclaimed 2 square feet of space. I also threw 4 bags of recycling into the recycling bin. That is something to be proud of.  The yarn will have to find another home.

The journals that I save because I thought that they would bring me joy, only made me cry.  The loss can still be raw all these years later.   It still amazes me that a child and later a young man with so many physical and medical issues could bring so much joy to so many people.  

I know all my family grieves him in their own way. No form of grief is bad.  We all move forward at different speeds.  

Wednesday

 While I was cleaning yesterday I found 3 years worth of so last century day planners. My feeling on the subject is that if I have not needed the information since 1993, 1994 or 1995, I really don’t need to keep it.  I also managed to empty 4 inches of shelf space.  They are now in the recycling bin.  

It is currently snowing at our house. The only place it has not melted is on the barbecue.  The only question is will there be any left by the time I wake up tomorrow morning.  All I have to say about this winter is that the weather has been very weird.  We are fluctuating between the mid 70’s to snow to lows in the teens.  

Part of the backyard covered in snow. Not enough for a snowman.  This is a big deal in Tucson.  

More Zenning

 If it is all possible, I am doing more Zenning around the house. It’s a good way to end the year. I figured that the first day back from vacation was the best day to start.  At breakfast I made my to do list, which was not comprehensive.  I started with the den fireplace and removed all my spinning and weaving projects and supplies. Everything has a new home.  Even the skein of yarn that went to the Goodwill box  

This lead to needing more shelf space in the knitting room. So I went on a Sugar and Cream hunt. I almost filled a 32 quart box. I decided not to finish the 2 blankets in the bag so they went into dog pillow stuffing.   They were not even a complete block of a 9 block pattern.  Sometimes to move forward I need to let go of things that are not in the least bit useful.  I have learned that it is not necessary to keep or complete every project, or reuse the yarn.  I even put the knitting needles and accessories in their proper homes. 

I came up with an absolutely brilliant idea for a color combination for my next pounder scarf.  So I went on a hunt for black worsted weight yarn. The black combined with a very bright and bold variegated yarn will make a nice one of a kind scarf.  I will be winding additional skeins of black worsted weight yarn tomorrow. The scarfs after that will either be black and white or a scrappy scarf of many colors. I have the first 2 1/2 rows knit and I am in love with the combination of yarns.  I also finished one hat and another pounder scarf tonight. I call them pounders because each weighs in at at least 17 ounces. They are also 6 feet long, which is good for a cold climate.  Pictures are going to happen tomorrow. 

The most interesting part of the day was watching John.  When I finished cleaning up the fire place, he had to do more dusting and tie up the cables to make things look even better. He then went on to his own cleaning agenda.  I can’t wait to see where this leads us.  

Well my typing hand is getting really cranky so I will call an end to this post.

Bye-Bye Bibs

 Today I decided that I am no longer making special needs bibs.  All the supplies are heading to Goodwill with the exception of the cut up bandannas which landed in a dog pillow.  I have been trying to get myself to use up the supplies for charity donations.  After 1 1/2 years of trying John and I talked it over and decided it was time to let go.  Unfortunately for John that means another trip to Goodwill since he brought in a car full yesterday. 

The Impossible Dream

I have created the impossible dream.  I have zenned enough to make the guest room closet suitable for hanging clothes again.  Gone is the Fiber McGee closet*.  I swear that this is a true fact,  just ask Teri and John. I also have made 3 drawers, yes you read that right. Three drawers available for company after we pull the guest bed linen out of 2 of the drawers. I personally think that Teri and John never thought that this would happen.  

Yes I do find it very hard to get to this level of cleaning.  I made a personal vow to myself that I would never leave 60 year old boxes to be empty by someone else, unless of course it is a time capsule. So I challenged myself on a regular basis to let go of a few more things.  This process was compounded by the loss of Eric and moving faster than I like to go.  Progress is hard and painful at times.  A less cluttered house is better.

Progress must be made.  Always move forward and never backwards. If I look back too much all I will do is cry.


* For the younger set, Fibber McGee and Molly was an old time radio show.  Fibber McGee was know to have a closet’s so full that when a door was open things came tumbling out.  I really doubt that the millennial’s in my readership would understand because they move so often. The less things that they have the easier that the moves are.   If you can find an old recording it is well worth making the time to listen. I always found it fun to listen to.  Maybe some lager media company will bring them back.

De Stash

This is today’s de stash project. All these magazines are going to a friend who sells vintage.   A lot are over a decade old, this is vintage in the knitting world where the yarn companies try to bring out new yarn every 3 months.  A lot of them I bought before I knew how much I disliked knitting socks.  Others because I no longer need a pattern to knit hats, blankets  and scarfs.  Some of the styles will not a look good on my older self.  So out they go.  I decided not to count them, but I did put them into a box that I don’t have the lid for.  If I give the box with the Magazine’s does this count as de stash too?

On ward with more deep cleaning.  Zen on.

Letting Go and Moving On

Today was a very productive day. After the guys left, I started cleaning the house. This was serious cleaning. The TV was off. My goal to get as much done as humanly possible. I can say the house is almost back to where it was before I got sick.

As an added bonus for cleaning I took apart the silverware drawer. Put all of Eric's special forks and spoons away in a bag. I guess I have come to the conclusion that no matter what I want. That is for Eric to sit down at the table and eat with us in a conventional way. It is never going to happen again. He is perfectly happy with the tube feedings. His tummy is always full and he has the energy to do other things. We are not sitting at the table 3 or more hours a day feeding him. Which gives him and us time to do other things.

I might have over done a little on the cleaning this morning because I took a 3 1/2 hour nap after lunch. I still have to work on balance in my life. After the nap I did one errand when I should have done 2. I did find time to work on Teri's blanket today. I got 2 squares finished and another one started. Followed by spinning after dinner. All in all I would say that it has been a very good day.